Mel Gibson and the Denver Broncos: Road Warriors

Decked out in protective equipment and leading his band of warriors into an alien environment, the leader of our pack faced down a formidable foe and vanquished him into the good night.

No, I'm not talking about Mad Max or even the real life Mel Gibson. I'm talking about Broncos' quarterback Jay Cutler, captaining his band of merry men into the Meadowlands of New York and returning home with an impressive victory and a stranglehold on the AFC West Division title.

Nobody picked the Broncos to have a chance in this game. To hear the talking heads at ESPN tell it, the Broncos would have been better off taking in the beautiful snow here in Denver this weekend rather than facing the first place New York Jets.

But that, as they say, is why they play the game.

In the same way that the Oakland Raiders shocked the Broncos Country faithful with their 31-10 shellacking of Denver last Sunday at Invesco, the Broncos returned the favor to the Jets in a windswept day in front of their hostile home crowd.

All the talk leading up to this contest was the matchup of quarterback gunslingers: the old maid Brett Favre and the young rapscallion Jay Cutler.

Showing no ill effects from the rainy conditions, Cutler upstaged his aging counterpart by throwing for 357 yards and two touchdowns while Favre could only muster 247 yards through the air while amassing zero touchdowns and one interception.

The much maligned Broncos defense forced the balanced Jets' attack into three turnovers on downs, the aforementioned interception, and three fumbles, one of which Broncos safety Vernon Fox returned 45 yards for a first quarter touchdown.

The real story of this game, and of the 2008 season, has been the Broncos' utter ineptitude at home and their collective poise and performance on the road.

The Broncos now stand at 4-2 on the road coming off comeback wins against Cleveland and Atlanta and this commanding victory against the J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets.

Road warriors, perhaps, but New York fans should be very familiar with inconsistent teams who get hot at the right time due to their ability to perform at a high level in front of belligerent opposing fans.

The 2007 New York Giants were muddling around in mediocrity for much of their Super Bowl season. After ripping off six straight wins, they lost two of three to drop their record to 7-4.

Then, after notching three straight road wins and snatching a Wild Card spot with a 10-6 record, the Giants went on the road for three playoff wins against the Buccaneers, Cowboys, and Packers before knocking off the perfect Patriots in the Super Bowl.

Now, this is not a Super Bowl guarantee for the Broncos, far from it, but teams that find ways to beat good teams on the road are able to gain the confidence needed to continue their streak of solid play into January.

With a three-game lead on the San Diego Chargers with four games left in 2008, the Broncos seem headed to the playoffs for the first time since 2005.

The four remaining games include two home bouts with the 2-10 Chiefs and the free-falling Bills and two roadies against 9-3 Carolina and the hated rival Chargers to end the season.

Though it would take a mini-miracle for the Broncos to not make the playoffs, there is no time to get cocky, not with the way these Broncos have built us up one week only to break us down the next.

If they take care of Kansas City at home next week, like they should, they could make the end of the season drama with San Diego a moot point.

But the last two weeks have proven that on any given Sunday, anything can happen

Masterson's Musings Part Deux

- So it appears the Broncos have gone back to the tradition of playing glam-rock supergod Gary Glitter's "Rock and Roll Part II" after every Broncos touchdown. They had shied away from it the last few years after Gary's, ahem, "unflattering transgressions" had come to light. Child molestation charges be damned! That song gets me fired up!

- The Mets and Brewers both put their September chokes on hold for at least one night by winning both of their games in dramatic, walk-off fashion. It's a good thing too. Both Mr. Met and Bernie Brewer had mysteriously disappeared before their respective games. After the wins, it was discovered that Bernie had ridden off on his Harley with a 30 rack of Beast Light, leaving Mrs. Brewer alone with their handicapped child, Beast Ice. Mr. Met, stumbled into Shea Stadium in the 9th inning, a blue ribbon attached to his jersey proclaiming he had finished 4th in a Barry Bonds look-alike contest in a Staten Island bar. More to come on the status of these two mascots after this weekend of play.

- Jorge de la Rosa picked up his 10th win of the year tonight for the Rockies as he shut down the almighty powerful (AA) Giants lineup in San Fran. Though he did have an odd sequence to start off the second inning. He crossed up his catcher, fired one to the backstop, and then proceeded to do the same thing again, but magically kept a run from scoring when one of his Dontrelle Willis' bounced right back to Chris Iannetta and he tagged the runner out at the plate. No word yet on whether Kevin Costner told him to do this.

- So I was watching The Patriot starring Mel Gibson today and it got me thinking. Instead of Mel Gibson for the role of Benjamin Martin, what about a real Patriot, like Tom Brady? I can see it now.....his son, passionately telling his father that he must fight for his country.

Tom Brady's son: I am not a child!
Tom Brady: You're my child!.......I think, wait, which one's your mother again? You were the little bastard I had with Bridget Moynahan, right? Or were you Gisele? Shit, I can't keep track of all that hot chicks I've banged in my life. Ah, what the hell, go to war. I'll still look good on the cover of GQ talking about God and how he guides all of my touchdown passes with his loving hand.

Or better yet, how about America's Golden Boy, Brett Favre? ESPN says he loves America. They also say he singlehandedly ended the War on Terror by playing in a homo-erotic, multiracial flag football game with Osama bin Laden. Can't you imagine this scene from the Patriot? Favre with the American flag, charging the limey British general, making sure his Wranglers are spotless, he pops a Prilosec OTC (or was that a pain pill?) and jams the soul of America into the heart of those cheeky Brits. I think a tear just fell from my eye...

-I'm almost positive that we could cut down on violence in this country by about 57% if every year, we had a National Punch AJ Pierzynski In The Face Day.

-Go Broncos.

Masterson's Musings...

A few true statements about the world of sports that you may find hard to believe...

- Baseball is actually NOT disbanding as a sport just because Yankee Stadium is closing its doors. There will be a 2009 season and probably many seasons after that. Someone should let the suits over at ESPN know that.

- If ESPN doesn't mention either the Yankees or Brett Favre at least once every 7 minutes, Jean Claude Van Damme gets to nutpunch Stuart Scott on national television.

-Speaking of Stuart Scott, in an intro to his own conversation with, you guessed it, Brett Favre, he actually compared Brett Favre to the Pope. He then went on to justify New York's newspaper coverage of Favre's introduction to the city (17 pages!) to the Pope's visit earlier this year (a measly 12!) by stating that after all, the Pope hadn't thrown for over 400 touchdowns and wasn't coming to a new team after 16 years. Yeah, the Pope knows a thing or two about not switching teams for the money considering he's been with the same one for about, oh, 2000 years.

-Things that don't exist: a bad Will Smith movie, the tooth fairy, Al Davis' eHarmony account, young Republicans, and the Broncos defense.

-Willy Taveras has flied out to right field in 87% of his at bats this season.......or at least that's just what it feels like.

-Greg Reynolds and Jason Hirsh have a lot of work to do during the offseason if they're even going to be in the mix for next year's starting rotation.

- The Broncos are 3-0. That's all you need to know.

Memo to Brett Favre...

...fuck you, buddy. Nobody cares about your stupid problems. The fact that the national media (ok, ESPN) has done nothing more than get down on their knees and fellatiate (is that a word?) you and Yankee Stadium the last few weeks is disgusting enough, but now the fact that you're adding to it by complaining to said media about the mistreatment you've been receiving from the Peckers, er, Packers is enough to warrant a stick in the eye. I was ready to give you the credit that you actually do deserve when you retired and I was ready to call you one of the top 5 greatest quarterbacks of all time, but you need to go away. I don't give two shits who you play for next year whether it be the Packers, the Bears, the Toronto Argonauts, the Rhine Fire, the Philadelphia Soul, or the frickin New York/New Jersey Metrostars, just go the hell away...and stay out of Denver.

Love,
Anthony