Since there are three Thanksgiving games tomorrow, I figured I should get my picks in beforehand (unlike last week). Since I am pressed for time at the moment, I am only going to do the three Thanksgiving games today and finish the rest, in the normal format, by Sunday. As is apropos, the picks will be Thanksgiving themed.
Tennessee @ Detroit
I am thankful for Tennessee playing in this game, because otherwise it would be unwatchable. With the Titans, it deserves at least a quick cursory glance, but that's about it. I am thankful for Kerry Collins' gamesmanship, and how everyone forgot that he is a racist alcoholic. I am thankful for Calvin Johnson and Daunte Culpepper because they are the only players on the team that anyone knows. They will save Collinsworth and Gumbel, or whoever else is doing this, from excessive dead air time. I am also thankful for CBS broadcasting on channel which people can watch. I would be more thankful, though, if there was a competitive game being played.
Winner: Tennessee
Seattle @ Dallas
I am thankful for homeless people and elderly couples with flat tires, because otherwise there would be no way for Tony Romo to show off how charitable he is. I am thankful for Jerry Jones' plastic face. I am thankful for teary-eyed press conferences where prima donnas repeat obvious things like "that's my quarterback." I am thankful for Homecoming Weekend in Dallas. The Jones family will surely have a wonderful time. I am thankful for multiple felons who are named after video game characters being allowed to play football after having spent more time in court, therapy and rehab than at practice. I am thankful for FOX broadcasting this game on a channel which people can actually watch.
Winner: Dallas
Arizona @ Philadelphia
I am thankful for desperate teams--from the coaches and front office down to the players. I am thankful for an 85-year old quarterback leading the NFL in passer rating and tied for first in prayers. I am thankful for Anquan Boldin's new face. I am thankful for Philadelphia's under-performance with and exceptionally talent roster, especially after they were a preseason Super Bowl pick by many. I am thankful for press conferences in which long-time NFL quarterbacks admit they don't know basic rules, but make up for it by using "which" every other sentence so that they sound slightly more intelligent. I am thankful for a sport forcing its players to play on a national, family-oriented holiday. I am thankful for the patriotism of Thanksgiving football. Nothing says America more than avoiding actually talking to your family on a family holiday, so that you can watch a brutally violent sport on television. "And I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free..." I am not, however, thankful for the goddamn NFL Network and it's horrible policies regarding service providers.
Winner: Philadelphia (riding the despration train)
I'll BRB with the rest in the next few games. LOL! BTW LMAO!
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